{he's my muddy buddy}

Well. I really should be sleeping right now... But I'm not. I have eight tests tomorrow and I really should be sleeping... But I'm not.
I'm staying up because I have to tell you about my friend Michael Thomas  ((my best friend))

I know I wrote a whole other post about him but I just HAVE to expound on my feelings for him.
((Also. He made me muddy buddies the other day. Hence the name of this post))

He is honestly the best person ever. I couldn't have asked for a more perfect guy. I mean listen to these qualities!!

• He smells good ALL the time
• He is extremely chivalrous, always opens doors for me ((even when I'm stubborn about it and pretend like I don't want him to but secretly I do))
• He is extremely handy, just today he fixed my doorbell. In like two seconds!!
• He is very very intelligent. I tell ya, that kid is going to be one heck of an engineer. He will do amazing things.
• He's funny :)
• He laughs at my jokes even when they aren't funny.
• He still hangs around me even when I'm deathly ill and extremely unattractve to hang around.
• He's the perfect height for hugs. I can rest my head on his chest when I hug him.
• He gives great hugs ((I never want to let go))
• He can tell when I'm lying
• He still loves me when I'm obnoxious
• He and I can do whatever, just chill on the couch for hours, and still have LOADS of fun.
• He treats his parents respectfully and honors them ((just as the commandments say to))

I could go on and on... But I just remembered about all my tests tomorrow... Yuck. Plus I haven't brushed my teeth yet. Dang it..

Anyway. From all that he sounds like the perfect guy right? Well he basically is. Not to mention the incredible example he is to me all the time. But really.. My testimony would be nothing without him.

My thoughts tend to go all over the place ((you know how they do)) and I can't help but think of the more than perfect Prince Charming of a boyfriend he'd be. But really, think about it! I mean I already love spending time with him, we're so comfortable around each other. Our families are basically meshed together now. Where could things go wrong?

Oh yeah. Me.
I'm the one that is killing the jam sesh that's goin on.

((This is probably going to be weird because he's going to read this but...))
He's liked me for a while. And I always took advantage of it. . Oh he'll always like me forever and ever, I'll be good. But then when I took his heart and ruined things ((what I always do...)) and I did the whole "lets be friends thing" he took it to heart. He's starting to not like me. And as things always are with me, I want what I can't have. The more I'm around him and the more I realize I can't have him, the more I want him. What's wrong with me? Why can't I just be like a normal person and WANT a relationship?
Well I mean... I do... I just don't know. All the time my head is like "Boyfriend! Boyfriend! Boyfriend! I want a boyfriend! Want want want! Need need need!" ((Typical high school girl thoughts)) but then when someone asks me about it or brings it up--the possibility of having that kind of relationship. My head screams "No! No! No!"

Why?! Why does it do that?!?!?

I'm just weird I guess.

Anyway. That's my best friend for ya. He's the greatest. But really. He is.

I also apologize that post was more of a journal-no-one-should-ever-read-this kind of entry. But I wrote it on the Internet for everyone to see. ((Good Amy. What a good idea. You genius you))
It's whatever.



Goodnight. 32.