Monday, February 27, 2017

When the spirit brings tears..

Hey y'all I am home from my mission!
It zoomed by faster than a armadillo being chased by a toddler, but man, it sure was the greatest 18 months. I needed that spiritual growth somethin' fierce. I left a lot of people in Oklahoma who I love dearly, but they are still in my heart.

One of my great regrets from my mission is that I didn't journal as well as I wish I would have. There are many excuses I could use but it doesn't erase it! So in being home there are many things that trigger memories of the mission and I want to write them all down so they won't disintegrate in my memory bank.
Tonight during Family Home Evening with my parents and Matthew, and Hannah, we sang A Child's Prayer, my favorite children's hymn. As we sang, I choked up and tears started to roll as the spirit brought to my remembrance one of the most powerful baptisms I attended while on my mission.

It was in Lawton, Oklahoma. It was the baptism of Nichole. She had had QUITE the journey, she was lesbian but conquered her old lifestyle and had managed to quit smoking which was the biggest of feats in "Smoke-lahoma" since everyone is hardcore addicted to their cancer sticks. There were quite a few missionaries in attendance there since we had investigators in attendance but more so since everyone had fallen in love with Nichole and some missionaries were even allowed to come back (since they'd been transferred) even the mission president was in attendance, this was his FIRST baptism since he'd been out in the field.
For the musical number all the missionaries in the room were invited to come up and sing A Child's Prayer. We did not know that we would be doing this, so as my companion and I walked up there to join the other missionaries they quickly filled us in that the elders would sing the first verse, the sisters would sing the second verse, then when we sing together the sisters would sing the first verse and the elders would sing the second verse.
The pianist began playing.
The elders sang, and I grinned from ear to ear as their tender, untrained voices strained to sing the high notes of the first verse. They sounded like little children! Then we sang the second verse, it's usually the girls sing first then the boys sing second but I liked this version! Then for the third verse we combined and sang together.
Me being the only one to remember to come in with "Heavenly Father" I sang a solo for a bit before the other sisters joined me, as we sang the spirit smacked me in the face: We are his children, and this is our daily prayer to Him. Tears rolled down my cheeks as what used to sound like little tone-deaf children, changed to a choir of angels. I KNOW there were angels singing with us, I have no doubt about it in my mind, I felt it! I looked at our mission president, President Mansell and there were cheeks streaming down his face too.

As if the spirit wasn't strong enough in that moment, then came time for Nichole to be baptized. She met Brother Timothy G. Hudson down in the water. And she smiled from ear to ear from excitement. Brother Hudson raised his arm to the square and began to say "Having been commissioned..." but his voice quivered and he broke into sobs. He enveloped Nichole with his arms and cried for a few moments then raised his arm back up, said the prayer, and by the power of the priesthood, he helped Nichole enter into a covenant with Heavenly Father to always follow and remember His son, Jesus Christ. When she came up out of that water, she beamed and glowed with the light of Christ just exuding from every pore. She truly had been changed.

25 And the Lord said unto me: Marvel not that all mankind, yea, men and women, all nations, kindreds, tongues and people, must be born again; yea born of God, changed from their carnal and fallen state, to a state of righteousness, being redeemed of God, becoming his sons and daughters;
26 And thus they become new creatures, and unless they do this, they can in nowise inherit the kingdom of God.
Mosiah 27:25-26

Monday, June 8, 2015

the last one

So listen ya'll tomorrow I am being set apart as a missionary for the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints. Yup. TOMORROW.
It's crazy how soon it came but I am so excited that the day is finally here!
I'll have a mission blog that my family will update, and you can read allll about me. It's:

And don't even hesitate to write me a letter or send an email.
Love you all, see you in 18 months!

Thursday, May 21, 2015

shots shots shots shots shots EER'BODY

I have seen quite a few needles lately.
Shots on shots at the doctor for my mission immunizations.
I had bone graft surgery two days ago.
Then yesterday, I had a mole removed on my arm.
And then today I had an ingrown toenail removed.
Let me just tell you all about my experiences.

Shot at the doctor.
It went real quick, barely even 5 minutes. Quick poke in each arm, no harm no foul right?
WRONG. The next couple days my arms (especially my right) were SO sore it felt like I had been working them out for days. Good news.. they are ok now.

This is how my surgery went. We go to the Periodontist, I sign the BIGGEST check of my whole life, then they took me back to my room where I answered a bunch of medical questions.
No, I don't have high blood pressure.
No, I don't smoke.
No, I don't have heart murmurs
and no I certainly hope that I am not pregnant!

Once we got through all the questions, I got all hooked up to the machine which included: sticky monitors on my chest and stomach, blood pressure cuff, finger clamp, and even a cannula with oxygen going. This was serious serious business.
Then came the part I was most nervous for... the IV. yikes.
But I channeled my inner Bubba (he loves getting is blood taken and getting shots) and I was brave.
The doctor came in and took my arm, he tied the tight thing around my arm, dabbed the alcohol on my vein.. yeesh just thinking about it gives me the heeby jeebies. "Little poke" and it really was little! It didn't hurt as bad as I remember it hurting when I got my wisdom teeth out (almost 3 years to the day!) then he asked about my mission. "I'm going to Oklahoma! They've had.. a lot of..."
GONE. I don't remember anything after that moment. Next thing I know I'm sitting in the lazy boy in my front room. Crazy how drugs work huh?
The doctor told my family that I wouldn't really be entertaining because of the anesthesia he used, I would be more groggy. So they didn't record me... :( But I guess I did do some funny things!
-waved at them when I got wheeled out in the wheelchair, saw my hand and looked at it confused
-told everyone about the "catheter" they put in (the cannula)
-when Heidi was helping me walk into the house, I was prancing and kicking my legs like a horse haha apparently it was really funny to watch and Heidi and my mom were laughing pretty hard
My face was numb for a while and when I'd smile it was pretty crooked.

Woke up the next day with rocks in my face, aka I'm SWOLLEN. It's pretty tender.. we went to my dermatologist appointment and I had a mole that needed to be removed. in no time at all I was getting a shot in my arm to numb the mole, then with what looked like an xacto knife blade they just scraped off the mole. YUCK.

Today, the toenail. He, my foot doctor friend, came to my house and says "Are you ready?"
Me, not knowing that the procedure entailed said yeah! I'm ready. Well I sit on the chair, both excited and nervous at what is about to happen. I have seen an epidural placed before and I'm almost positive the needle he whipped out was LARGER than the one they have for epidurals. But, I am brave.. and "quick poke" DUDE. That quick poke was actually a very long and very painful poke. I watched as lidocaine and marcaine filled my big toe and it nearly doubled in size. "Alright just a little deeper" And he pushes the needle in further! I am squeezing the nearest object (my phone) as hard as I can and am holding my breath. He pulls the needle out then does the exact same thing on the other side of my toe. It felt like my big toe was on fire. But then, quick as a wink, my toe is completely numb. He does the procedure, which looked extremely painful but I couldn't feel a dang thing. Wrapped it all up and now I've got a lovely purple toe. And it's safe to say that I am a human pin cushion.
SO many injections and shots this week. My boyfriend would be so proud of me :) :) I love you Bubs.
no more mole... just a bandaid
swollen. it feels like there's sandbags in my cheeks
one of the bone grafts! Looks pretty good eh?
I can't smile straight HAHAH #crookedsmile

The surgical stuff

"I'll make an incision here"

Goin' ham on my foot

one of the 2 injection site. LOOK AT THE BRUISE
Just another day in the life, am I right?

Sunday, April 26, 2015

Sister Dymock

I got my mission call!!
Yay yay yay!
It was the greatest, most surreal moment of my life.
The wait from the time my papers were in to the time I was holding it in my hands was excruciating. But when it finally came there was no purer joy than the joy I had.

I've been called to the Oklahoma, Oklahoma City mission, and I leave on June 10!! That's so soon! It's crazy! But I wouldn't have it any other way. It's English speaking which I'm grateful for but also kind of bummed because I really would've love to have learned Spanish but I really am grateful to be speaking English! I'll be honest, I was disappointed for about half a second but as I read where I was going... it just felt right. I KNOW this is where I am supposed to go and I am needed there. I cannot wait to serve!! Only 45 days... Can you believe that?

So much to do in so little time! I'm excited to go through the temple! Ah! I'm just so excited :) So.. I'll be a missionary before y'all know it. Whoo hoo!! Yay missions. Yay the Gospel. Yay LIFE!
Also this is TOTALLY where I am supposed to go because I LOVE crazy weather and Oklahoma has freak hailstorms, crazy lightning and thunderstorms, and is the CENTER of tornado alley! yes, yes, yes! My mom wasn't too happy when I told her that but she got her wish when I wasn't going foreign. I know I wasn't called to Oklahoma just for the cool weather... Someone there needs me. ME. And I'm excited to serve with every part of me, a year and a half dedicated to the Lord. I could not be more excited :)

Sorry mister, I'm a sister!

Monday, April 20, 2015

Well, first things first. Technology HATES me.
Every phone charger in my house will not work, they all have shorts in them. So my phone spent the weekend dead.
My Mac laptop loses "juice" on a dime, has to be constantly plugged in, but does my plug work anymore? NOPE. There's a short in it.
Well played Apple. Well played.
Technology.. can't live with it. Can't live without it

In other news, Bubs leave to Argentina TODAY. His first flight leaves around 2 and I'm just antsy in anticipation waiting for that phone call from him at the airport :) I can hardly believe that he's been gone this long already. I just got used to him being just a few miles away, now that he'll be thousands of miles away.. I'll just have to readjust.
Trying to be a good girlfriend I sent him some favorites to the MTC this past week. Panda Express, Taco Bell, Little Caeser's... they didn't give any of it to him! But they'll give him the candy and cookies I send him. Ask me how that makes sense... in my opinion it doesn't but oh well.
I love getting his letters and reading all his emails, he's just doing so well. Here are some of the latest pictures. This was them saying "goodbye"

"Sweater Saturday"
Good heavens that boy has my heart.

My papers are IN, they were sent to church headquarters last Sunday. Still hasn't been assigned but I'm still hoping they will come this week. I just want to know where I'm going!! It's not real quite yet but as soon as I'm holding the call and I know where I'm going and I know when I'm leaving THEN I think it'll be real. I am secretly hoping to go foreign (like England or New Zealand) but I just get the feeling that I'm going to go stateside which is great! Where ever I go is where they need me and I need me. God is just so awesome like that :)

Monday, March 16, 2015

yayy yayy we're in love

eeeyyyyy ohhhhh. Happy 11 months to us!

Me and Bubs have OFFICIALLY been together for 11 months. I say officially because we were baaasically together before then but it didn't become official until I came home from a bad date and said "Bubba, will you be my boyfriend?" Smartest and best 6 words I've ever said.

I got my very first email from Elder Lunt today, and believe me it was THE BEST. Ever since I woke up this morning I was checking my email about every 5-10 minutes. He's doing so well! Oh my goodness. He's the district leader (why am I not surprised?) his companion's name is Elder Vance. Which I have a funny story about.
So one day into his mission I wrote him a letter and drew him a picture of he and his companion. I had NO idea what his companion looked like so I drew him kind of nerdy looking with a bow tie, big glasses, and hair parted down the middle. I guess he thought it was pretty funny so he showed his companion and today in his email I got a picture of the two of them. "Based on the picture in your letter"
His companion rolled his tie up into a bow tie, put on glasses, and slicked his hair down JUST LIKE MY PICTURE! Hahaha oh my :) I definitely got a good laugh from that one. These two are going to be a good companionship, I can already tell.
He said there's an elder in his district that will eat anything you dare him to. Which includes: 3 pieces of paper, chalk, and a banana peel. YIKES.
They had hot wings for dinner one of the nights. Elder Lunt said, "They weren't even hot" which is MONUMENTAL for him. He used to think the Honey BBQ at Buffalo Wild Wings was hot (don't worry not anymore) but he just has a sensitivity to hot things. Haha.

Hearing from him made my whole day, it made the past days of agony worth it.
I love my elder! Happy Anniversary babe.

Wednesday, March 11, 2015

Elder Lunt

I have a missionary.
That's just crazy!
I never thought that this day would come.
But it's here.

After work yesterday, he picked me up from work and we went over to the mall to do one of those photo booths, after that we drove me home really fast. By then it was 6:10. He was getting set apart at 6:15
I was hoping for time just to be with him..
time to just sit and talk, cry with each other, just hold him... but our goodbye process was a little less than 60 seconds and it was heart wrenching. He held me in his arms and held me as I sobbed. He tilted my chin up, told me he loved me. He kissed me quick on the lips and then he was gone.

  I can't describe the feeling that set in, it came so quickly. It was a mixture of love, anger, frustration, aloneness and pure sadness. That wasn't how I imagined saying goodbye! That was my worst case scenario of saying goodbye to him. But that's how it was.

I cried for a while, I just let it all out. After a while I cleaned myself up and headed over to his house to go see the Elder. He looked so handsome, in his suit and the tie I gave him for his birthday:)

It was weird. Not being able to touch him, stand close to him. Anytime I would get near everyone would freak out and say "book of mormon apart! book of mormon apart!" or "remember he's a missionary now.." Psh please. I know DANG well he's a missionary now. But I just smiled.
It was especially hard since all I wanted to was wrapped my arms around him but I couldn't, I watched as all his siblings, nieces, and nephews got big hugs. I had to settle for a handshake and a sidehug.
He did wink at me though :) I love when he does that.

Reed was there, he and Ryan were joking about how I wouldn't wait for him and they were making bets of how long it would be until I got married. But they're wrong. I am waiting for him. I'd be stupid to let someone so important to me go.
Ryan still had his tag at the house so he put in on Bubba, that's when it really set in. He's a missionary. And I won't get to see him for two years.
Yes, I will still get to email him and send letters back and forth, but that doesn't fill the void of your best friend just up and leaving. He was always the best part of my day. I lived for his smile. Or his laugh! But mostly I'm going to miss his touch. His giant warm secure hugs, or even just a brush of his finger across my cheek.
I didn't cry at all the whole time I was there, but as I was walking out the door he said "wait!" and I turned around and looked up into his eyes.
"I.. um. I'm just going to miss you"
And that did it, tears welled up in my eyes and started to stream down my face. I wanted more than anything else just to hug him, or squeeze his hand. Any sort of reassuring touch. But I walked out the door and just let the tears flow down my face.
I called Allison and I'm amazed she could understand me through all the sobs. She came and picked up and we just drove around. We picked up Paige and we listened to sad songs. I cried, they cried with me. The one song that really got me was Superman by Taylor Swift. It just fit perfectly when related to a missionary. He's going to "save the world" and "go to work"

He sent a snapchat to everyone saying:
See you all in 2 years!
Then he sent one just to me:
And you. I love you with all my everything

Waking up this morning wasn't my favorite thing, I had a headache from crying so much last night and my throat was so sore. I think I'm getting sick. Normally when I wake up I check my phone for a text from him, there wasn't.
I went to text him, then stopped. remembering...
I don't even know why I have a phone now.. I only used it to communicate with him! Everytime it vibrated I went to grab it, excited that it was him, I don't know why I thought it would be him. I knew it wouldn't be.
I got permission from work to stay home, so I laid in bed and cried. I cried and cried. The pain you feel, it's unexplainable. It's not a break-up pain or a someone-you-love-died pain. It's worse than both of those! It's a pain where the person you love, the best thing in your life, isn't within texting or calling reach. It's a pain where you internally tear yourself to shreds knowing that you won't be WITH him for two years. Just being with him, we didn't have to talk, was always my favorite part of the day. Will I get to see/talk to him on Mother's Day and Christmas? I'm not sure.. that's up to his family. Within an hour of each other I wrote him a letter and sent him an email. It'll take me some time not being able to update him with every new part of my day, him just being a text away. Now I have to just write highlights and not too many because he'll have a lot of emails to read in a small amount of time each P-day.
This really is quite cruel. It's a necessary evil. But I'm willing to put up with this torture. He's totally worth waiting for. Call me crazy but I love him. And I'm waiting.  

He got dropped off by his family at the Provo MTC at 12:30, I'm grateful that I didn't go because saying goodbye to him again would've killed me. It's strange thinking he's just in Provo, just a few miles away.. but he seems so much further than that.
Today was pretty rough, I felt like a koala bear, a crying koala bear. All I did today was sleep, cry, cry a lot, sleep, then cry. REPEAT. It's good to cry, it's healthy and it helps! I would be ok but then someone would ask me about it and then tears would flow. Man, why is this so hard?!
I KNOW he's doing a good thing. I KNOW he's serving the Lord. I KNOW he's being protected. I KNOW I'll see him again.
Why can't my tear ducts understand that?

I went and did some retail therapy, that felt good. Except I felt super sick and hot the whole time AND because my mind has been in such disaray I forgot to put on deodorant so I stunk!
I've had no appetite at all today.. I knew I needed to eat so I tried to eat something but that just made my stomach hurt worse. I can't tell if I have stomach pain because I'm getting sick or there's just a pit in my stomach because I feel so awful about being separated from Bubba. I'm kind of like that dolphin in Boy Meets World, she was separated from her mate so she cried all day and didn't eat.

Then, the highlight of my day. An angel, named Sarah came over with a smile on her face. She had flowers and chocolate chip cookies and a spirit that exudes pure joy. She's been in my situation and lived to tell about it. She knew how I was feeling and came to tell me that it's ok to be sad, but it will be ok. We looked at all the positives of his mission and she was really excited when I told her that I was going on one. I'm grateful for her and I know she was sent here by the power of prayer.

Regardless of all the hurt and loneliness, I'm grateful Bubba is serving right now. I wouldn't have it any other way. I'm grateful for a Father in heaven who listens to my sob-filled prayers. And I'm grateful for a knowledge that everything is going to be ok.

I love you Elder Lunt!! DO WORK!