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I don't understnad.
Exactly. I don't understnad. 
I don't understand so much I can't even spell understand!!

Sometimes I get nervous around people and act a certain way
--FOR EXAMPLE--
When I see cute boys or any boy actually, I will drive recklessly. Why? I don't know. Maybe it's to show them my "bad girl" side. Or that I'm cool? I don't know. But I always regret it afterwards. Why did I do that? My conclusion... It's just what my natural reaction is.

Well, tonight I reacted the way my body naturally did. But I didn't want to react that way! I turn into this silly foolish careless girl who wants the attention because you're around. I want you to notice me, because I'm fun! But instead.. I hurt people, knock over pizza, and look like an idiot.
It's not my fault, it's YOURS! YOU made me act that way!
Well.. not really you. It was me--but I just get nervous around you. I wish I didn't do that. But since you've clearly moved on to bigger and better things (or in this case, smaller and skinnier) but I'm still working on it.
My heart still beats a little faster when I see you, I still forget to breathe when someone says your name.

why? I DO NOT KNOW WHY

Goll, this broken heart thing is getting old.
I mean, it's not really broken. I'm fine! I'm not sad and mopey and crying all the time depressed broken hearted. But the thought of you still makes me sad.
And I don't want that anymore!
puh-leeeeeez can I finally get ALL the way over you? It'd be nice.

Anyway. To anyone I've ever acted stupidly around--I'm sorry. I really didn't mean it. I'm just immature sometimes. Not on purpose, I just get nervous and react accordingly.
One day, I will learn to be "cool and conservative" like everyone else and I won't look like such a fool all the time.
One day.



"Toothpicks are only good for so long"
-wise words from the roommate Amie